3 a.m.: Li’l Foot starts to stir

3:01: wonder what that kinda sorta knocking noise is that’s coming from down stairs, resign to the fact that you don’t want to know really and go about my business.

3:05: I drag my butt out of bed and get her and nurse her and she falls back to sleep.

3:30: back to sleep

4:15: hubbie kisses me on the head before he leaves

5:30: Li’l Foot stirs again

5:35: drag my ass out of bed GDI!!!

5:45: alarm goes off

6:00: get up for reals and put Li’l Foot in her crib and ignore the fact that she doesn’t like that idea. Get in shower.

6:01: remind self how much you LOATHE tetthing!!!

6:10: get out of shower

6:15: get dressed

6:30 get Li’l Foot dressed in Patriots warm up outfit because the Patriots play tonight and she must don the proper attire to ensure proper good luck vibe. (Also snicker that hubbie is gonna have a fit when he picks LF up at daycare because he’s a Jets fan and we have not one single Jets garment for LF)

6:40: head downstairs to continue getting ready

6:41: put LF in her high chair and give her some cereal

6:42: turn on Barney (HATE!)

6:43: grab my lunch, LF’s milk and other assorted food products for daycare

6:45: remember you wanted to bring in a box of tissue to daycare sot hey can stop using the sand paper they have on LF’s delicate little nose.

6:46: remind self again how much you DESPISE teething!!

6:47: dry hair and brush teefers

6:48: take dog out and go start the car

6:49: careful not to slip slide on the ICE (HATE!)

6:50: hurry dog along and remind him he’s not out to find his soul mate by sniffing every inch of our front wall.

6:51: remind self to put dog on eBay! okay, then remind self that is not acceptable.

6:55: gather things and the kid

6:56: curse yourself for taking the house keys out to the car with the rest of the keys so now you have to steal a key from another set to lock the front door.  BLAST YOU Monday morning mush mind!!!

6:57: slip slide your way out of the driveway

7:05: arrive at desolate daycare facility where only the snow plow is occupying the nearest 2 mile radius. Only notice that you’re not the only dumbass who went to daycare this morning as evidenced by the other tire tread marks (not snow plow tire treads!).  Tune car radio to nearby radio station and hear that you are a dumbass and the school district has a 2 hour delay therefore daycare does as well. knucklehead! think to self, you suck because you really should’ve checked the radio and television for school closures and delays before you left home or at least called the daycare. remind self you’re a dumb ass and could’ve slept a little longer. 2 hours longer to be exact.

7:10: head home

7:06 listen to LF fuss in the back seat

7:07: start winging the Li’l Foot Mommy internal repertoire of songs…Track 1: ABC’s, Track2: Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, Track 3: Old MacDonald’s Farm e.i.e.i.o., Track 4: I Love You, You Love Me, we’re a happy fam – i – ly, with a great big hug and kiss from me to you, won’t you say you love me too, I Love you, you love me, we’re best friends like friends should be, with a great big hug and a kiss from you to me, won’t you say you love me too. (Yes I’m well aware this song is Barney’s theme song but I really wanted to get it stuck in your head…you’re welcome!!!) Track 5: The Wheels on the Bus Track 6: Track 7: Track 8: Track 9: Track 10 (okay so my internal mommy CD isn’t fully “cut” yet and I wind up hitting my internal shuffle button and resinging all the songs again in differnt orders about eleventy milion times, but hey for the most part it keeps LF quiet and she loves my singing (that makes one of us right?) and this morning it really did work because the little darling fell asleep by….

7:10: LF fell asleep in the back seat

7:15: arrive back home still cursing myself for not listening to the radio or watching tv. (and realize hey, that smacking noise earlier in the morning was the rain hitting the bay window roof awning thingy…duh!)

7:16: open LF’s door and watch as she startled herself awake and it was the funniest thing because you could swear she made it seem like how grandpa used to do when you’d catch him sleeping and he was all, “huh? wha? I’m awake, I wasn’t sleepin’ nope, not me!” type of way.

7:20: once inside, set up LF with breakfast and make your own breakfast (and finally thank the school district for the extra time at home with your daughter)

7:30: sit down and enjoy your egg sandwich and hot chocolate with whipped cream….mmmmmm

okay fast forwad cuz this is getting uber-boring

8:30: call metro north and find out train schedule

8:35: listen as the automated bitch tells you that the trains are at 9:13 and 10:13…but hello, daycare opens at 9 and I CAN NOT MAKE IT TO THE TRAIN STATION AND ONTO THE TRAIN IN 13 MINUTES ON A GOOD DAY…NEVERMIND IN SNOW AND ICE

8:36: make the decision to leave ASAP for daycare and hope someone is there and you can leave LF there early

8:40: get ass and tiny LF tushy out the door

8:50: arrive at daycare and notice the onslaught of parents and kiddopusses at daycare all at once.

8:51: notice when you get inside that there is only 1…count her…ONE…daycare employee there and about 7 kiddopusses. they’re only allowed 4 per worker…do. the. math.

8:52: resign yourself to the fact that you’re not making that 9:13 train…you were a twit for even considering it!!! Proceed to getting LF squared away with water cup and more breakfast

9:15: another daycare employee arrives.

9:17: listen as the daycare employees tell you your childs picture came in and OMG the cuteness…it kills!!! (they didn’t do normal pictures…they had a photographer come in to take pictures then they took those pictures back to their studio and had artists do renderings of your child…see…

This is the original picture that I took a picture of with my Treo so that’s why it looks terrible (but still cute, right?)…

And this is the artist rendering they did from that picture (also taken with the camera on my treo)…

Okay, so it looks better in person!  I’ll try and get a better picture with my real camera tonite!

So where was I…

9:20: debrief LF’s daycare person of the new food regiment…no more jarred food…make a note of it!  She has oatmeal, baby banana, yobaby yogurt, string cheese stick, soup for lunch and some banana and strawberry toddler bits for munching on at snack time.

9:25 kill time until you can leave for the train station

9:30 try to give LF a bottle which she wants no part of

9:35 clear off the changing table so you can change LF’s diaper, and once it’s cleared off observe the daycare worker take another kid to the table to change him.  **sigh**

9:36: wait your turn

9:40 our turn…change diaper

9:45: decide it’s time to leave for the train

10:00: arrive at the train station

10:01: find a kick ass parking spot right next to the entryway to the train platform staircase (and take ap icture because no one will believe you got such an awesome parking spot…see…

My car is the one right behind the white one next to the trees…yay me!!! I might never move my car from there again…I’ll just walk home, just to keep that awesome parking spot!!! That’ll never happen again.

10:02: look at that cute picture of your daughter again!

10:05: Change sneakers to dress boots because the ice is no longer an issue and it’s easier to wear them than to carry them to work and chagne there.

10:10: board train

10:11: train still hasn’t left but he conductor is taking tickets already, hear him punching the tickets

10:11:30 seconds: have a heart attack because you don’t have your train pass OR your company ID. which wouldn’t have done any good because it’s a new month and you never put your December train pass in the ID sleeve. curse yourself again.

10:12: thank the good Lord for small favors because before you left this morning (the first time) you put all your bills/envelopes to be paid in your bag and in that gargantuent stack of bills was your December train pass too!!!  Go me!!!

10:13: train departs, conductor comes around!

10:30: arrive in Katonah train station and notice old family friends boarded the train there and then talk to them the entire way to the city

11:30: get harrassed by your friends that you’re not at work yet (hi Moonshine!)

11:55: arrive at work…**sigh** finally!

12:30: get harrassed by your other friend that you haven’t posted the blogpost you promised your readers when you Twittered this morning! (Hi Delight!)

1:30: curse that you haven’t gotten a phone call back yet and IM everyone them know you’re frustration and impatience!

1:31: hear your cell phone ring, and it’s the person you were expecting to call back 

2:00: heat up soup for lunch only to be totally turned off by leftovers

2:01: remember that you don’t have your comapny ID…AND…then remember that you don’t even have your wallet because your an idiot who leaves your wallet and cosmetic case in the diaper bag because that’s what you carried around all weekend not your bag.  So I have no form of money in any way, shape or form…I rock!!! Not really!

2:05: beg your boss to borrow his ID card to pay for lunch at the cafeteria…hate that he saved you et again.

2:10: chow down on wings and waffle fries! because after the monday you’ve had, you deserve it!

3:00 and on: Blog about it!

4:20: remember that you still have yet to pump allllllll day long…stop blogging you dumbass and go pump!

P.S. contrary to what you might think, I did actually get work done today!